I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
