the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
