why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
