He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
