I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Hippo gnu deer
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
