you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I intend to get homeless drunk
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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