You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
