For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
