do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
i love accidental penises.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Randomize