Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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