He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
