i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
no you cant smoke seaweed
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
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