I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
