her vagine was all disorganized.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
