do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
