dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
