physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize