She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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