Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
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