Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
