But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
