Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Fuck appropriateness.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
