My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Randomize
