Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
