Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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