so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Ketchup is God's man juice
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
