How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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