My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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