a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
