think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
