you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
