Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Boobs are out for the taking
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
