So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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