Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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