if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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