He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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