how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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