He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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