i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
