Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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