I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
