super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize