i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
