The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
