Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
