so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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