At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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