If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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