Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Randomize
