fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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